(no subject)
May. 24th, 2006 07:45 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
which_chickGather round, kids! It's time for a spot of math is hard detectoring. When you take math stuff in school, sometimes it seems like it's all total wankeritude meant to make your life a misery. Where, you ask, is the value in math? Do maths even *have* a money shot? (Yes.)
I'm sure everyone is as interested in the wayward CDs as I am. Don't worry -- there is math content. It's just math content attached to money and that, in my book, is the really exciting sort of math content anyway. In hot pursuit of my missing money, I called the bank this morning and the bank lady said that her records indicated that the CDs for me and for brother-the-elder were redeemed in July, 1992. I would have been twenty-two by then and I probably would have remembered redeeming a CD, but I'm coming up empty on that. She said that she would contact the actual branch of the bank where the CDs had originated to see if they had any further information. I'm still waiting to hear back. Poor Ada at the bank -- her only mistake was answering the damn phone at the stroke of 8:00 AM. Helpful hint: Most people who call that fucking early have an axe to grind.
Brother-the-younger is making out a little better. His money is showing up as unclaimed on the state unclaimed property database so last night I called brother-the-younger and had him get started on claiming his money. He called this morning to tell me that the fine folks over at patreasury.org reported that he had about four thousand, two hundred dollars owed to him as a result of the wayward CD from 1984. Sugoi! Brother-the-younger, who is an attorney and rather cautious about predicting success, feels fairly confident about his chances of getting this money. Huzzah for him!
Now, this $4200 is allegedly the sole proceeds of a five-year CD of $1000 at a rate of 10.90%, compounded yearly. That CD, which started in December of 1984, hit the Pennsylvania Unclaimed Property database in 1994 according to both the bank and the patreasury.org website. (I hope you're taking notes. This material will come in handy here directly when we get to the math part.) According to the stuff on the back of the CD certificate, it was supposed to renew at the prevailing rate when it came due at the end of the first five years. The prevailing interest rate dropped from 1984 to 1989, so the rate the CD got in 1989 would probably have been lower than the 10.90% that the CD started at.
Here's the math content:
1000 @ 10.90% for five years, compounded annually: 1677.48
1000 @ 10.90% for ten years (1984-1994), compounded annually: 2813.94 (This is a highball estimate, sort of the maximum possible amount that the CD could have been before it hit the unclaimed property database.)
Unclaimed money waiting for an owner at patreasury.org does not earn interest. If the money went into the unclaimed property database in 1994, it stopped earning interest in 1994.
But... the patreasury.org people claim that there is $4200 waiting for brother-the-younger. What the hell is going on?
(All ya'll appreciate how you get to be reasonably intelligent when I write the dialogue for you, right? Right? Aw, hell. Just nod and smile.)
I'm so glad you asked. I have a theory. Here is my theory:
1000 @ 10.10% for 2.5 years (the 30 month CDs that Roy and I had got a lower rate than the 5 year CD brother-the-younger had), compounded annually: 1271.94
1677.48 (brother the younger's CD after one term, no renewal)
1271.94 (mine after one term, no renewal)
1271.94 (brother-the-elder's after one term, no renewal)
============
4221.36
Whaddya think? (You can skip over the My god! That's brilliant! part. I'll take it as read.) Coinkydink or not? Note, above, that the state says brother-the-younger has about four thousand, two hundred dollars coming to him. According to the state, the entire $4200 is listed under brother-the-younger's name. That shouldn't have happened. Either the bank or the state fucked up.
What are the odds that the bank can prove it turned my CD and brother the elder's CD over to the state in 1992 when those CDs were "redeemed"? If the bank cannot, in point of fact, prove that, then is it okay to hit the bank up for additional money even though I'm pretty damn sure I know what happened to the money? Do you think I might be able to come out of this with, y'know, mo' money than the $1271.94 that is due me? Is it... er... horribly unethical to stick it to the bank if they were responsible for taking my money and giving it to my brother without asking me? (I could be estranged from brother-the-younger, with no chance of hitting him up for my money. It could happen.) How about if the bank can support their giving of it to the state in my rightful name (in 1992) whereupon the state fucked it up later, in 1994 when brother-the-younger was assigned all of it? Can I stick it to the state, then?
I don't want to be done yet -- this is actually rather more fun than I expected to have with the long lost CDs.
I'm sure everyone is as interested in the wayward CDs as I am. Don't worry -- there is math content. It's just math content attached to money and that, in my book, is the really exciting sort of math content anyway. In hot pursuit of my missing money, I called the bank this morning and the bank lady said that her records indicated that the CDs for me and for brother-the-elder were redeemed in July, 1992. I would have been twenty-two by then and I probably would have remembered redeeming a CD, but I'm coming up empty on that. She said that she would contact the actual branch of the bank where the CDs had originated to see if they had any further information. I'm still waiting to hear back. Poor Ada at the bank -- her only mistake was answering the damn phone at the stroke of 8:00 AM. Helpful hint: Most people who call that fucking early have an axe to grind.
Brother-the-younger is making out a little better. His money is showing up as unclaimed on the state unclaimed property database so last night I called brother-the-younger and had him get started on claiming his money. He called this morning to tell me that the fine folks over at patreasury.org reported that he had about four thousand, two hundred dollars owed to him as a result of the wayward CD from 1984. Sugoi! Brother-the-younger, who is an attorney and rather cautious about predicting success, feels fairly confident about his chances of getting this money. Huzzah for him!
Now, this $4200 is allegedly the sole proceeds of a five-year CD of $1000 at a rate of 10.90%, compounded yearly. That CD, which started in December of 1984, hit the Pennsylvania Unclaimed Property database in 1994 according to both the bank and the patreasury.org website. (I hope you're taking notes. This material will come in handy here directly when we get to the math part.) According to the stuff on the back of the CD certificate, it was supposed to renew at the prevailing rate when it came due at the end of the first five years. The prevailing interest rate dropped from 1984 to 1989, so the rate the CD got in 1989 would probably have been lower than the 10.90% that the CD started at.
Here's the math content:
1000 @ 10.90% for five years, compounded annually: 1677.48
1000 @ 10.90% for ten years (1984-1994), compounded annually: 2813.94 (This is a highball estimate, sort of the maximum possible amount that the CD could have been before it hit the unclaimed property database.)
Unclaimed money waiting for an owner at patreasury.org does not earn interest. If the money went into the unclaimed property database in 1994, it stopped earning interest in 1994.
But... the patreasury.org people claim that there is $4200 waiting for brother-the-younger. What the hell is going on?
(All ya'll appreciate how you get to be reasonably intelligent when I write the dialogue for you, right? Right? Aw, hell. Just nod and smile.)
I'm so glad you asked. I have a theory. Here is my theory:
1000 @ 10.10% for 2.5 years (the 30 month CDs that Roy and I had got a lower rate than the 5 year CD brother-the-younger had), compounded annually: 1271.94
1677.48 (brother the younger's CD after one term, no renewal)
1271.94 (mine after one term, no renewal)
1271.94 (brother-the-elder's after one term, no renewal)
============
4221.36
Whaddya think? (You can skip over the My god! That's brilliant! part. I'll take it as read.) Coinkydink or not? Note, above, that the state says brother-the-younger has about four thousand, two hundred dollars coming to him. According to the state, the entire $4200 is listed under brother-the-younger's name. That shouldn't have happened. Either the bank or the state fucked up.
What are the odds that the bank can prove it turned my CD and brother the elder's CD over to the state in 1992 when those CDs were "redeemed"? If the bank cannot, in point of fact, prove that, then is it okay to hit the bank up for additional money even though I'm pretty damn sure I know what happened to the money? Do you think I might be able to come out of this with, y'know, mo' money than the $1271.94 that is due me? Is it... er... horribly unethical to stick it to the bank if they were responsible for taking my money and giving it to my brother without asking me? (I could be estranged from brother-the-younger, with no chance of hitting him up for my money. It could happen.) How about if the bank can support their giving of it to the state in my rightful name (in 1992) whereupon the state fucked it up later, in 1994 when brother-the-younger was assigned all of it? Can I stick it to the state, then?
I don't want to be done yet -- this is actually rather more fun than I expected to have with the long lost CDs.
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no subject
Date: 2006-05-24 11:38 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-25 12:56 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-05-25 01:44 am (UTC)If the bank lady is quietly hoping I will give up and go away, she is going to be disappointed. This is entirely too much fun to give up on, particularly now that I am reasonably sure that my money didn't go where it was supposed to go. I'd like for us all to reach that very special place where some bureaucratic entity admits that it has screwed my pooch and is sorry about it. That always warms the withered cockles of my cold, shrunken heart. It would be ever so much more warming if the entity could show how sorry it was by offering additional money, but I'm not holding my breath on that front.