The real plumber
Jun. 3rd, 2021 08:26 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
which_chickSo I'm at work yesterday and I get off at 4. At 3:30, I get a call about a water leak in pipes above the water heater in one of my apartments. I go to look at the water leak. It is in the water heater cupboard, which is a fairly tight fit, and there is about six inches of room to work. I can just about reach things with my left (not-preferred) hand. Hooray.
The problem is that a sweat pipe joint has failed and it is dripping water at a pretty good clip. Like, this isn't something that can be left until tomorrow.
I look at the issue a bit, deciding where the pipes will have to be cut and replaced (we now use PEX and Sharkbite fittings for these repairs because drying out and re-sweating copper joints is a royal pain in the ass. The pipes on this property run in the ceiling and they drip forever and don't get dry and they are difficult to re-sweat without burning like an hour of your time trying to dry them out first.) and mentally making a shopping list.
Tenant: "Wow, that looks pretty complicated. Are you going to call the real plumber?"
Me: (fake laugh) "Well, let's just see how it goes. Let me get some parts. I'll be right back."
I go to the hardware and get the parts I need. I come back and start cutting the pipes at the appropriate places for the repair. It is taking a while because only the wee pipe cutter fits in the space (so no leverage) and I can only use my left hand (which is weak).
Tenant: "Are you sure you don't want to call the real plumber?"
Me: "No, it's fine. I'll get it. Just, this is my left hand because I can't get my right in the space. There's not a lot of room to work."
I finish cutting the pipes and fetch out the sharkbite fittings. (If you don't do plumbing, these are almost-magical "SHOVE ON THE PIPE" fittings that (a) you just SHOVE ON THE PIPE and (b) do not leak. They're pretty magical for like eight bucks each. They work. They work well. But it can be a little disconcerting to see your "not-real" plumber shove a fitting on the end of the pipe without any tools and expect it to stay there. I get that.)
Tenant: "Where are your tools? That's never going to stay there without tools."
Me: "These are push to fit. You don't need tools. You just shove them on there. They're a pretty recent invention, like 2007 or something I think."
Tenant: "I think you should call the real plumber. This is a pretty complicated repair and there is no way that's going to work."
Me: "I'm almost done. I think it'll be fine. We'll be able to see if it's still leaking right away, too, so if there's an issue we can address it promptly."
I put everything else back together and turn the water on. Nothing is leaking. Everything is fine. It is now 3:50 PM. This whole thing has taken twenty freaking minutes INCLUDING the trip to the hardware store.
Tenant: "That stuff will probably blow apart at like 2 AM."
Me: "If it does, call me and I'll come fix it."
Tenant: "Or you could call a real plumber."
I would like to state for the record that I did not club the tenant like a baby seal. I heh-heh'd in my fake laugh and went away.
And so I think to myself, how did the tenant define "real plumber"? Guy who is like "Not until next week, guv." Guy who charges a hunnert bux to step out of his van? Guy who doesn't have pants covering his ass crack? Or just... guy?
This is the low grade sexual discrimination that makes a high pitched whine like the seventeen year periodical cicadas, the background noise of my fucking life.
(Side note: We Have Cicadas! Welcome Brood X!)
The problem is that a sweat pipe joint has failed and it is dripping water at a pretty good clip. Like, this isn't something that can be left until tomorrow.
I look at the issue a bit, deciding where the pipes will have to be cut and replaced (we now use PEX and Sharkbite fittings for these repairs because drying out and re-sweating copper joints is a royal pain in the ass. The pipes on this property run in the ceiling and they drip forever and don't get dry and they are difficult to re-sweat without burning like an hour of your time trying to dry them out first.) and mentally making a shopping list.
Tenant: "Wow, that looks pretty complicated. Are you going to call the real plumber?"
Me: (fake laugh) "Well, let's just see how it goes. Let me get some parts. I'll be right back."
I go to the hardware and get the parts I need. I come back and start cutting the pipes at the appropriate places for the repair. It is taking a while because only the wee pipe cutter fits in the space (so no leverage) and I can only use my left hand (which is weak).
Tenant: "Are you sure you don't want to call the real plumber?"
Me: "No, it's fine. I'll get it. Just, this is my left hand because I can't get my right in the space. There's not a lot of room to work."
I finish cutting the pipes and fetch out the sharkbite fittings. (If you don't do plumbing, these are almost-magical "SHOVE ON THE PIPE" fittings that (a) you just SHOVE ON THE PIPE and (b) do not leak. They're pretty magical for like eight bucks each. They work. They work well. But it can be a little disconcerting to see your "not-real" plumber shove a fitting on the end of the pipe without any tools and expect it to stay there. I get that.)
Tenant: "Where are your tools? That's never going to stay there without tools."
Me: "These are push to fit. You don't need tools. You just shove them on there. They're a pretty recent invention, like 2007 or something I think."
Tenant: "I think you should call the real plumber. This is a pretty complicated repair and there is no way that's going to work."
Me: "I'm almost done. I think it'll be fine. We'll be able to see if it's still leaking right away, too, so if there's an issue we can address it promptly."
I put everything else back together and turn the water on. Nothing is leaking. Everything is fine. It is now 3:50 PM. This whole thing has taken twenty freaking minutes INCLUDING the trip to the hardware store.
Tenant: "That stuff will probably blow apart at like 2 AM."
Me: "If it does, call me and I'll come fix it."
Tenant: "Or you could call a real plumber."
I would like to state for the record that I did not club the tenant like a baby seal. I heh-heh'd in my fake laugh and went away.
And so I think to myself, how did the tenant define "real plumber"? Guy who is like "Not until next week, guv." Guy who charges a hunnert bux to step out of his van? Guy who doesn't have pants covering his ass crack? Or just... guy?
This is the low grade sexual discrimination that makes a high pitched whine like the seventeen year periodical cicadas, the background noise of my fucking life.
(Side note: We Have Cicadas! Welcome Brood X!)
no subject
Date: 2021-06-03 01:08 pm (UTC)(Nice to know about the sharkbite fittings. I haven't attempted any plumbing -- we have an awesome and amazingly responsive plumber who likes us and gives us price breaks left right and center -- but we're also looking at moving to land and the properties we can afford are... pricey. So it may be me, my partner, and Plumber Youtube, while my wife and metamour cheer from somewhere less grimy.)
no subject
Date: 2021-06-03 04:52 pm (UTC)