(no subject)

[which_chick]

Busy day at work today -- we took out the tree that Mrs. Jay planted ages ago. There was chipping and shredding. I also fixed a sink (the hand-tighten nuts were loose so the assembly was moving around more than it should) and unclogged a grease plug in a kitchen drain.



In response to the Bad Payer email, Dad says I should probably offer Bad Payer some sort of deal where he can pay what he owes (all the back payments owed plus accrued penalties and stuff) in exchange for me dropping the court case. Then, we can carry on as before.

Maybe I should do something like that, to show that I am willing to try to work things out but honestly? I think it'll piss off Bad Payer. Bad Payer seems to want to pretend that the winter of discontent never happened and that we should start over with a fresh slate, ignoring all that has gone before. I'm not interested in doing that, at all.

Also, if Bad Payer is all about paying me back in a timely and prompt fashion like a GOOD borrower, then why hasn't that been happening up to now? I'm also somewhat convinced that this is not going to happen because total, Bad Payer owes me like 4,500. The "back amount due" part is a pretty large hunk of that. If he'd been making the payments on time, he'd only have a couple more payments after the court date to be "paid off."

*sigh* However, Dad says that I have to look like I want to work things out. Damn it all, I'm fresh out of patient, here. Bugger. So, now I have to draft a letter explaining, NICELY, to Bad Payer that what I really need is the back money that he owes me before the court date in order to make me drop all the charges. If I get that, then we can continue as if we've been getting along nicely ever since the start. If I don't get that money, then we will proceed to a judgment so that his credit can be fucked for ten years.

Is there a nice way to say that? I'm not seeing one, y'know. And he is claiming I said things on the phone that I didn't fucking say. I didn't turn down his offered payment for April but I also pointed out that he really needed to pay me at least enough to cover the monthly interest on the balance owed. I kind of said my thing and he kept talking about making April payments and it was like we were having two different conversations.

Wanna see a sample letter? Sure. I can do that.

******************

Dear Bad Payer:

In your email, you expressed a desire to work something out regarding the debt that you owe me so that we didn't have to go to court over the matter. I can certainly understand that desire, as court hearings are inconvenient, time-consuming, unpleasant experiences for everyone involved.

Reviewing your loan status, my records indicate that you owe back payments and penalties for October, November, and December of 2007 as well as for January, February, and March of 2008. April 2008's payment is past due but not into the penalty period yet and there are also two certified letters charged against your account for the mailings dated xxxx and xxxx. Therefore, the total due at this moment (I am disregarding the demand note for the purposes of this discussion) is $3283 (ballpark).

Despite my better judgment and acting with a complete and total disregard for your previous payment history, I will agree to drop the case, rescind the demand note, and continue onward with the schedule of regular monthly payments that was set forth in the amortization schedule that you received when you signed the note if you can bring your account up to a current and paid-up state at any time between now and the hearing date.

Amount that would have to be paid to me bearing a postmark on or before April 30, 2008: 3283

Amount that would have to be paid to me bearing a postmark between May 1 and May 14, 2008: 3305

Amount that would have to be paid to me bearing a postmark between May 15 and May 31, 2008: 3752

Amount that would have to be paid to me after June 1 but no later than June 11, 2008: 3774

NOTE: Due to the delays involved in regular postal mail, I do not suggest attempting to mail payment via first class mail any later than May 31 if you would like to be sure I have it by June 11, 2008. Overnight mail delivery though services such as UPS, FedEx, and DHL seems to work reasonably well and can probably be used safely as late as June 8, 2008. After that point, I would strongly suggest that payments be made in person or via electronic funds transfer so that you may be sure that they arrive safely and in a timely fashion.

*****************

Whaddya think? Too much? Not nice enough?

Comments

[cousin-sue.livejournal.com]

No, I think it sounds good. Not smarmy, and it give clear instructions.

I would have written something remarkably rude, but then tidied it up and cut away the rude stuff. But that's my therapy.

[carv1982.livejournal.com]

Perfect. I also think you should actually address him as "Bad Payer" ;-)

[which-chick.livejournal.com]

I can't do that. There are laws regarding what one can and cannot do to bad payers in the world of debt collection, including how often one can call, where they may be contacted, and how the debtors are to be treated. Name calling is right out. I can't drive down and stand in front of his place of business with a big sign saying "Bad Payer owes me money and he ain't paying me back." I can't take out an ad in the local paper to the same effect. I can't post it on the internet (Why do you think he's "Bad Payer" on here? Because I LIKE the guy and want to protect his reputation? No. Because I am not *allowed* to do that.) or otherwise make his total lack of repayment public so that other people can know what a shit he is. (This will change once I secure and record a judgment against him. Judgments, once recorded, are public fucking record. HURRAY!!!) I can't be threatening or sound even remotely violent, either. I can't swear at him. I'm not allowed to unload buckets of incisive sarcasm in my dunning letters. I'm not allowed to accuse him of having had nonhuman parents or of fish fucking or of lying to me about his intent to repay or anything even remotely amusing.

There are *rules* regarding debt collection and most of the general rules tilt toward making creditors treat debtors, even very delinquent ones, as human beings with rights and dignity even thought they don't fucking honor their contracts. This really rankles, but those are the rules. However, when we get far enough along in the process to be standing in front of a judge, I am the one who is right and Bad Payer is the one who is wrong.

The only way I will nto win is if I fuck up badly enough to be deemed a threatening/harassing/predatory creditor, which, if I do it badly enough, Bad Payer don't owe me no more and may, in fact, have grounds to sue me for *damages* incurred from during collection efforts. (Yes, for real.)

However, if I play by the rules, I will have no difficulty securing a judgment against him. The fact that I have to behave myself no matter how angry and snarky I get along the way, well, life is full of times like that. :) I get a lot of practice being not-snarky in my day job, so it's not like it's foreign to me... just frustrating.

Actually...

[aardvark99999.livejournal.com]

You, as the original "holder" of the debt, are not subject to the Fair Debt Collection Practices Act. You have much more leeway. You could, in fact, refer to him as "Fish Fucker" although I do not believe that would be likely to achieve the desired result (repayment).

If a third party to the transaction tried to collect on your behalf, then the rules are different. I think it is advisable to follow the FDCPA rules anyway, but if, in a moment of weakness, you refer to him as "Fish Fucker" over the phone, you will not be violating federal law.

State law, particularly that of the Commonwealth of Virginia, may provide more restrictive rules for creditors attempting to collect, and I know nothing about their rules.