(no subject)

Have you ever gotten cut badly and unexpectedly using a razor blade or a really sharp knife? I'm talking about the kind of cut that blooms red instantly but doesn't hurt until you've stared at the blood welling up for several extra-long seconds of horrified anticipation. Sometimes I write things that cut like that.

These days I try pretty hard not to send that sort of stuff out to people -- those very-special comments get edited in the rewrite. There's enough needless cruelty in the world that I don't need to be adding to it.

The thing that really sucks, though, is that sometimes the razor blades I write are beautiful, perfect things. I absolutely fucking hate having to throw them away without at least showing them to someone who will understand their perfection.

(no subject)

If money can't buy happiness, why do we have the Make-A-Wish Foundation?

They've been advertising on the radio lately, since it's the season of giving. The radio spots they're running on my local radio are vignettes of happiness bought and paid for -- a trip to Disneyworld, a swim with dolphins, a shopping spree, and so forth. I think the message I'm supposed to be getting from the ads is how Make-A-Wish brings light and hope to the lives of critically-ill young people. That seems to be the general aim of the ads outside of the give us money angle. However, what the ads got me to thinking about was how much happiness costs. (I am not an easy person to advertise to.)

A bit of research on the internet determined that, as a responsible nonprofit, Make-A-Wish is pretty fiscally transparent. As a matter of fact, they've got detailed financial reports online, including their tax returns and their annual reports. A person interested in the price of happiness could download their Annual Report in .pdf and do the math.

What kind of sick bastard would do something like that? Me.

On page 11 (.pdf page #), the Letter from President and Chairman, it says 11538 wishes were granted for the 2003 fiscal year. On page 30 (actual page number is 28 but the .pdf document is page 30 of 40), the Combined Statement of Functional Expenses, we see that the direct costs of wishes was $68,107,157.00 for the 2003 fiscal year. So. Doing the math, we can see that happiness costs just about $5902.86 if you're doing it on a one-to-one basis without any corporate overhead. However, if you are buying happiness via a sizeable nonprofit foundation, happiness costs $11,638.90 a la carte due to administrative costs and other stuff. (For this, I used the total expenses number on pdf page 30, lower right corner of the table.)

So. Now you know.