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which_chickWe're several weeks into lockdown and sheltering at home and social distancing and people are wearing masks to go anywhere. It's fun. I'm having a great plague over here. Barberry remediation efforts are continuing. Not like I'm gonna run out of barberry.
Horse still gets to be ridden, but he's like the singing frog in the Warner Brothers cartoons. He only sings when I'm the only person who can see him. I need a singing frog that everyone can see.
In fairness, we were going to take video yesterday. But then Trysta's son Mordecai wanted to come along (he's 7 and does not really ride and does not ever come along but Trysta wants to encourage him to like horses so every time he DOES ask, we take him along even though it ruins everything for the entire day) so we took him along. We also took Laur (to lead Mordecai) and Casper (Trys's ancient pony, for Mordecai to "ride") and the unhelpful border collie because why not. Mordecai got bored and got off the horse and started frolicking in the woods and running around in the field and crouching in the grass and exploding upwards with yelling and swinging sticks around and the unhelpful border collie was bouncing around and so all of that was what you might call less than useful. Laur did take some video of my horse being tight and upset and failing to deliver a right lead canter and going sideways at a high rate of speed in his best rendition of high-n-tight, but there's not much point in displaying his I CANNOT WORK UNDER THESE CONDITIONS unhappiness. It looks like shit.
I was kind of hoping to get some halfway decent video of our current work so that I could send it off to people on the internet who are familiar with me and my horse for feedback because apparently we will be quarantined forever and the entire horse season of horse things is shut down. My cellphone does not do a good enough job of this shit. It is not a good video camera. Also, I am going to have to get video some other way than "Trys can do it" because she is a bad videographer and she's always holding her horse who pulls and grazes and the camera therefore moves wildly. Laur can do video but not while she's holding a grazing pony and trying to keep track of both the boy and the border collie. And I can't have Mordecai and a border collie bouncing around and get any freaking work at all out of my horse. It's just useless.
I can't work under these conditions, either. *sigh*
And more bitching. Under the CARES act, the earliest that I can evict a nonpaying tenant is August 23.
I had a tenant that I was preparing to evict prior to the covid-19 nonsense. We had filed for eviction. We had had the eviction hearing. We had won the hearing. We were in the waiting period between the hearing and BEING ALLOWED TO FILE FOR POSSESSION (10 days) when our court system shut down for evictions.
Tenant paid zero rent for February. Tenant paid zero rent for March. Tenant paid zero rent for April. And because of the fucking CARES Act, even if my courts reopen, I cannot evict this fucking bitch until August 23. I feel kind of justified in assuming that as there was no rent for February, March, or April, there is not going to be any rent for May, June, July, or August. The rent is $600 a month. That's $4200 in total, not counting the court costs or the unpaid water and sewer bill. The EIDL grant money we got from the beloved government for the business that owns the building was $1000. So, yeah. Not helping over here, you fucking idiot government. This is just one tenant among many. We're down about 20% for April over March. We're going to be down more in May.
I am not taking out a goddamn loan to "pay" for the rent I didn't get. First off, I don't need to do that. I operate my business with a substantial war chest that is sufficient to weather about two year's worth of expenses without a nickle of other income. (We went into Covid-19 with slightly over quarter of a million dollars in cash, actual spendable dollars sitting in a bank account. I drive old cars and dress like a hobo because I choose to do so. I am not actually poor.) This is because I do not make bad financial decisions (BOEING, DO YOU FEEL SHAME?) because I am not big enough for a bailout and if I fuck up, I fail. Second, interest is something that other people pay me, not something I pay to banks.
That said, I am not operating a charity over here and the government just passed the stupid CARES Act that decided I would give away free rent to tenants forever and ever (with no hope of getting it in the future). The rent is "still due" obviously but if you think for one hot minute that Tenant has ever in her entire life had $4200 at one time, you are not in touch with the realities of poor people life here in Greater Rednecklandia. I can and will evict the person in August, but I will never, ever see the rent money for the Covid-19 adventure. That money is gone. The tenant is not ever magically going to earn money in excess of what is needed at that particular instant to keep a roof over her head. She's poor. She will continue to be poor. She is not ever going to make more money and she is not ever going to pay me for this eight months of housing. Nobody is ever going to pay me for the eight months of housing. It's gone.
I will claim it as a loss on my taxes and we will move forward. I will, at the end of this shit, account for the uncompensated taking of the government and send a letter off to my congressional assholes, not that it will do one fucking lick of good.
Congratulations, landlord, you get to fund some of the #covid19relief!! We didn't ask you about this. We don't give a shit that you have bills of your own to pay. We particularly have no interest in the fact that we are MAKING YOU GIVE SHIT AWAY WITHOUT YOUR CONSENT. It's for the good of the country. Suck it up you fucking parasite. Also, where is your compassion?
My compassion? Glad you asked. It's the same place as my rents that I'm not getting.
Horse still gets to be ridden, but he's like the singing frog in the Warner Brothers cartoons. He only sings when I'm the only person who can see him. I need a singing frog that everyone can see.
In fairness, we were going to take video yesterday. But then Trysta's son Mordecai wanted to come along (he's 7 and does not really ride and does not ever come along but Trysta wants to encourage him to like horses so every time he DOES ask, we take him along even though it ruins everything for the entire day) so we took him along. We also took Laur (to lead Mordecai) and Casper (Trys's ancient pony, for Mordecai to "ride") and the unhelpful border collie because why not. Mordecai got bored and got off the horse and started frolicking in the woods and running around in the field and crouching in the grass and exploding upwards with yelling and swinging sticks around and the unhelpful border collie was bouncing around and so all of that was what you might call less than useful. Laur did take some video of my horse being tight and upset and failing to deliver a right lead canter and going sideways at a high rate of speed in his best rendition of high-n-tight, but there's not much point in displaying his I CANNOT WORK UNDER THESE CONDITIONS unhappiness. It looks like shit.
I was kind of hoping to get some halfway decent video of our current work so that I could send it off to people on the internet who are familiar with me and my horse for feedback because apparently we will be quarantined forever and the entire horse season of horse things is shut down. My cellphone does not do a good enough job of this shit. It is not a good video camera. Also, I am going to have to get video some other way than "Trys can do it" because she is a bad videographer and she's always holding her horse who pulls and grazes and the camera therefore moves wildly. Laur can do video but not while she's holding a grazing pony and trying to keep track of both the boy and the border collie. And I can't have Mordecai and a border collie bouncing around and get any freaking work at all out of my horse. It's just useless.
I can't work under these conditions, either. *sigh*
And more bitching. Under the CARES act, the earliest that I can evict a nonpaying tenant is August 23.
I had a tenant that I was preparing to evict prior to the covid-19 nonsense. We had filed for eviction. We had had the eviction hearing. We had won the hearing. We were in the waiting period between the hearing and BEING ALLOWED TO FILE FOR POSSESSION (10 days) when our court system shut down for evictions.
Tenant paid zero rent for February. Tenant paid zero rent for March. Tenant paid zero rent for April. And because of the fucking CARES Act, even if my courts reopen, I cannot evict this fucking bitch until August 23. I feel kind of justified in assuming that as there was no rent for February, March, or April, there is not going to be any rent for May, June, July, or August. The rent is $600 a month. That's $4200 in total, not counting the court costs or the unpaid water and sewer bill. The EIDL grant money we got from the beloved government for the business that owns the building was $1000. So, yeah. Not helping over here, you fucking idiot government. This is just one tenant among many. We're down about 20% for April over March. We're going to be down more in May.
I am not taking out a goddamn loan to "pay" for the rent I didn't get. First off, I don't need to do that. I operate my business with a substantial war chest that is sufficient to weather about two year's worth of expenses without a nickle of other income. (We went into Covid-19 with slightly over quarter of a million dollars in cash, actual spendable dollars sitting in a bank account. I drive old cars and dress like a hobo because I choose to do so. I am not actually poor.) This is because I do not make bad financial decisions (BOEING, DO YOU FEEL SHAME?) because I am not big enough for a bailout and if I fuck up, I fail. Second, interest is something that other people pay me, not something I pay to banks.
That said, I am not operating a charity over here and the government just passed the stupid CARES Act that decided I would give away free rent to tenants forever and ever (with no hope of getting it in the future). The rent is "still due" obviously but if you think for one hot minute that Tenant has ever in her entire life had $4200 at one time, you are not in touch with the realities of poor people life here in Greater Rednecklandia. I can and will evict the person in August, but I will never, ever see the rent money for the Covid-19 adventure. That money is gone. The tenant is not ever magically going to earn money in excess of what is needed at that particular instant to keep a roof over her head. She's poor. She will continue to be poor. She is not ever going to make more money and she is not ever going to pay me for this eight months of housing. Nobody is ever going to pay me for the eight months of housing. It's gone.
I will claim it as a loss on my taxes and we will move forward. I will, at the end of this shit, account for the uncompensated taking of the government and send a letter off to my congressional assholes, not that it will do one fucking lick of good.
Congratulations, landlord, you get to fund some of the #covid19relief!! We didn't ask you about this. We don't give a shit that you have bills of your own to pay. We particularly have no interest in the fact that we are MAKING YOU GIVE SHIT AWAY WITHOUT YOUR CONSENT. It's for the good of the country. Suck it up you fucking parasite. Also, where is your compassion?
My compassion? Glad you asked. It's the same place as my rents that I'm not getting.
