I did get the badge of useless honor (judge comment on score sheet references how cute/adorable/handsome/pretty the horse is) but I met the goals I was trying to meet and I can try to do more next time.

I do know from experience that if there isn't breathing and a significant non-frantic effort from me, there is absolutely no hope of anything from him. I still need to do a thorough read-through of the score sheets (lols will abound, I am sure) but I am waiting for pictures so that I can enliven that post with clean-adjacent, vaguely competent photographs of the horse.